June 25, 2011

25 Jun

On Thursday a vendor took me out to the most extravagant dinner ever.  She took me to Hurricane Club near Credit Suisse, which I had heard about before but had never been to.  My friends go there for drinks sometimes, but the food was AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGG.  First of all, this place doesn’t even look like a restaurant — from the outside it looks like some sketchy high class “telo” as they call them in Argentina, or, sex motel.  And then you walk in and there are these double doors as if it’s some super exclusive club or something, and then you walk through that and you’re like, oh.  It’s a restaurant.

Anyway, we sit down and immediately we order these mai-tai-esque drinks that are the prettiest things I’ve ever seen with a fresh slice of pineapple and mandarin orange pieces, and I take a sip and it tastes just like how I imagined those delicious-looking narcotic fruit drinks that Will Ferrell and Danny McBride are given by Chaka in Land of the Lost (most underrated movie of all time): http://vimeo.com/5729014

I go to take a piss and when I come back, my vendor has already ordered spring roll appetizers and immediately asks me what I want to order.  I tell her I really like anything and everything when it comes to food and that I’ll leave the ordering up to her, as long as there’s a fair representation of meats on the table.  She asks the waitress what she recommends and what their most popular entrees are, and she starts listing out, “Well our ribs are REALLY good, and our scallops too; the filet mignon is great; a lot of people like our cold sesame-peanut noodles; the spicy shrimp is another favorite”–WE’LL TAKE ALL OF IT, interrupts my vendor.

WAIT SERIOUSLY.  I looked over and did a total Sebastian jaw drop:

Sebastian Jaw Drop

Sebastian Jaw Drop

At this moment my vendor became my favorite person ever.  We were going to become best friends.  She was a very large lady (think: opera) so I think when she said that the waitress wasn’t all too shocked about that coming from her, but then she looked over at me and goes, “Um, are you sure?  The portions are actually quite generous so between the two of you ladies, I would recommend you maybe just share two entrees, not five……..”  WE’LL TAKE ALL OF IT, IT ALL SOUNDS DELICIOUS, I WANT ALL OF IT.

So there we had it.  Between one obese white lady and one small Asian girl, we had 5 delicious entrees and it was one of the best days of my life.  The filet was cooked perfectly medium rare and came with crispy fried onions, the ribs were phenomenal and fell right off the bone and came with these really interesting lotus root chips that were a better version of potato chips, the scallops were amazing, the sesame noodles were nice and gummy in a good way, and the shrimp was just the right spicy.  I thought I was going to be overwhelmed by all this food, but I was actually going at a pretty impressive pace since the thing about me is that when it’s just pure protein and hardly any carbs, I can really take down a lot (that’s what she said).

I was so absorbed in eating that I didn’t even notice that I hadn’t ordered a new drink in a while, but once I did I decided to go with the most interesting drink on the menu: a bourbon-based drink with lime and jicama juice with cayenne pepper, all served in an actual RED PEPPER SHELL.  I loved it.  Hurricane Club was my new fav hot spot.  And the best part was that my vendor let me take home all the leftovers (shocking…), which became the best leftover lunch the next day that I had ever brought to work.

%d bloggers like this: