Archive | April, 2009

Thursday 4/30

30 Apr

Today has been quite the junky day, busy day.  All yesterday and all morning I was really looking forward to my boss’s surprise baby shower today at 1pm (lots of free desserts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!).

But then NOOOOOOOOOOO our client call suddenly got moved last-minute to 12:30pm DAAAAAHHHHHHHH.  It’s ok, it’s ok.  I gently remind coworkers D and J who were also to be on the call that we have S’s surprise baby shower at 1pm so we should really try to cut our call to 30 minutes (from our usual one hour).  It’s ok, it’s ok, it can be done.

But then NOOOOOOOOOOOO at 12:25pm we get an email from the client “going to be 15 minutes late to the call” NOOOOOO DAAAAAAHHHHHH time is of essence and we are cutting it really close!!!!!!!!!!!!

SIGH.  En fin, we don’t start our call till 12:50pm, it of course ends up taking the usual full hour to get through our agenda, and by the time we get out I was so hungry (hadn’t eaten lunch in hopes the 1pm desserts would substitute) and was really upset we had missed the baby shower. 😦

I slumped back to my desk really discouraged when

GASP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG IT WAS LIKE CHRISTMAS MORNING!!!!!!!!!!!! A HUGE SLICE OF ICE CREAM CAKE AT MY DESK AND A HUGE PLATE PILED HIGH WITH COOKIES BROWNIES AND STRAWBERRIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My dear, dear coworkers, bless their hearts.  They knew how upset I would be for having to miss the baby shower full of food.  I am so lucky to have such wonderful coworkers who genuinely look out for my emotional, physical and mental wellbeing.

Tuesday 4/28

28 Apr

Well with all this bacon talk, I may have actually caught the “wine flu” from S – I am concerned.  Today I had no appetite whatsoever and went the entire day just eating one bagel and a Pepsi (luckily both were free – stashed the bagel yesterday and got the Pepsi from a meeting today).  Either I have the “wine flu” or it may have been the fact that I tried to defrost a frozen thing of cream cheese and the plastic container bubbled and melted into the cream cheese, yet I still ate it (because I had nothing else to put on my bagel).  Is melted plastic toxic?  Either way, I don’t really enjoy being sick, but I guess the upside is that I eat less – I still haven’t even gotten to all those Thai leftovers from Sunday night.

Monday 4/27

27 Apr

I’ve really scored some incred deals over the past few days.  Last night C, S and I decided to order from Spice — I had the Massamananan curry, S had beef pad thai, and C had crispy duck with fried calamari.  While we’re choosing these items from the menu, C can’t stop marveling at how “cheap” this place is ($10/dish), while I’m sitting there grumbling where the fuck are the $5 specials.  Anyway, the food was delish and I finish my entire meal, while C of course leaves half his duck and pieces of calamari, and S was still feeling sick from what I like to call the “wine flu” and literally only takes three bites out of his beef pad thai.  Youuuu know what that meanssssssss……..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <<huge grin>>

I went to work this morning all grinny because I was bringing an entire leftover pad thai, crispy duck and fried calamari, and I knew it was going to be a good week.  Boy was I right!  Just as I had suspected, the day turned wonderful when just as I’m about to heat up my fried calamari for lunch, I hear a food cart roll by.  GASP!!!!!!!!!  IT IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL ARRAY OF FREE FOOD EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!  Beef and chicken satay, coconut shrimp, spring rolls, pasta and salad and bagels oh my, and you betcha I grabbed ALL OF IT ARRRRRR MATEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love that feeling I get when I’m just about to heat up my free leftovers, and then I discover a fresh set of free food, so that I can save the leftovers I was going to eat for the next day; and then the next day, just when I’m about to heat up my free leftovers, I discover yet ANOTHER fresh set of free food, so then I save the leftovers from two days ago until the NEXT day; and so on and so forth until it’s Friday and I’ve just won myself an entire week’s worth of free food.  Sigh.  Such a feeling of triumph.

Sunday 4/26

26 Apr

Well this was quite the weekend for my poverexic self.  Yesterday S hosted an all day bbq, or rather, chili-fest, which was loads of fun.  I got there like two hours early to help out S (slash, so I could get a way head start on the chili…), and I can’t even tell you how excited I was at seeing how much meat was going into that humongoid pot of chili.  I actually think an entire cow plus a few woodland creatures went in there – there was like 23498234 lbs of ground beef, some steak, some steak tips, some buffalo meat, and probably some bison and bear and deer tossed in there too.  The chili was so delicious that I had 6 bowls throughout the day to cover me for breakfast, lunch and dinner.  I really think I ate more protein in that one afternoon than I had in the past 12 months combined.  And of course to accompany all the protein there was also cornbread and endless flowing beer.

It was a wonderful day of drinking from 12pm to 9pm, at least for me and everyone else.  I think for S it was a wonderful day of drinking from 12pm to 9pm and then everything went to shit.  We went out for dinner after that (of course I wasn’t going to get anything; I had just purposefully eaten 6 bowls of chili to last me through the rest of the weekend), and it was just a disaster.  After S buys a round of scotch for everyone (yessss!), we sat down at the table at this really nice restaurant, and S immediately starts throwing tantrums and making a scene.  He demands a double Maker’s Mark from the waiter, who brings it to him in a wine glass with ice with a straw (??????????), which S then two minutes later accidentally knocks off the table, shattering the glass and wasting the entire drink.  I wanted to cry; what S had just thrown on the floor was worth like a month’s salary to me.  S then proceeded to immediately pass out at the table with his hands behind his head.

When the food came (I didn’t order anything; just kept drinking my glasses of wine and scotch, and eating the free bread at the table), people would cut bits of their steak and place it in front of S who was plateless and still passed out.  Every time, I would pat his belly and yell “FOOD, S, FOOD!” and then he would half-wake up just to shove the food in his mouth off the tablecloth, then fall right back asleep in his hands-behind-head position.  I really can’t believe all this incredible food went wasted on blackout S, and I can’t believe I encouraged it with this belly patting.  Every time F or G would put food in front of S, what I really should have done was grab it away from S and shove it in my face.  I would have been much more appreciative of it, but I was just so surprisingly full from those 6 bowls of chili, cornbread, and god knows how many beers.  G was still kind enough to offer me her plate of liver and steak and green beans and ravioli — it was all rearry dericious, but I am ashamed to say I did not finish all of the green beans; I felt like such a failure to poverexia, such a fraud, to be so full as to not be able to finish a plate.  This will never happen again.

Anyway, in conclusion, the night turned out really expensive for our table of 8 + 1 man bear; luckily I only had wine, though that still turned out quite pricey in comparison to my usual $5.50 Tasty King dinners.  I think next week I’ll go back to Tasty King; that is really the best option there is in life.

Saturday 4/25

25 Apr


The French government is sponsoring cocktail parties in 19 countries across the world, including the U.S., in an effort to boost sales of wine and cheese — two of its more lucrative exports.

GASPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Crossing my fingers and hoping this party comes to NYC.  THE U.S. GOV SHOULD SPONSOR COCKTAIL PARTIES WITH FREE HAMBURGERS IN AN EFFORT TO BOOST SALES OF COWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Friday 4/24

24 Apr

Well this week really sucked at work.  Our office does this a lot — one week, there will be free food literally every single day, and then the next, there is literally no food for AN ENTIRE WEEK.  So then people like me have to resort to eating jelly beans for breakfast, lunch and dinner (though today I had Peeps for lunch.  Speaking of Peeps:

Good thing I had three birthday parties last night to make up for the terribleness of the lack of free food at the office.  Yesterday was L and L’s birthdays, so I started out the night at Bubby’s where I had some really good creamsicle drink that tasted exactly like a deliciously drunk creamsicle, and I also had mac ‘n’ cheese (which is quickly becoming my new staple food in addition to Tasty King beef and broccoli and burgers).  AND! LP’s mom picked up the tab for the entire party – hooray!

Then it was rushing directly to roommate L’s bday at Otto which is the best Italian restaurant deal in the city.  We ordered appetizers, cheese and honey, prosciutto, bruschetta, approx 10 pizzas, pasta carbonara, dessert and 9 bottles of wine for 10 people for $70/person.  That’s about how much I typically spend on food over a period of three months.  But it was so worth it.  Otto comes pretty close to beating Tasty King.  But not really.

Needless to say it was an incred night, and I know it was for L too when I woke up this morning for work to find L completely passed out sitting down (not lying down) on the living room couch with Reno 911 on the TV and a half-eaten order of cheese fries.  So I had a few for breakfast.

Wednesday 4/22

22 Apr

I WANT TO GO TO THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bakon Vodka

Bakon Vodka


Bloody Mary

Bloody Mary




Tuesday 4/21

21 Apr

Well it’s been quite the healthy two days.  Yesterday I had ramen for lunch, and SS was in town and we went out to dinner to Coffee Shop, where she picked up the tab for my dinner of bloody mary and mac ‘n’ cheese (!!!!!!!!).

Today my Jewish coworker gave me an entire bag of jelly beans that she didn’t want that her non-Jewish boyfriend’s mother had given her for Easter.  Didn’t the mom know Jews don’t like Easter jelly beans?!?!?!  BUT I DO.  love jelly beans.  So I had jelly beans for breakfast, jelly beans for lunch, ramen for dinner, and jelly beans for dessert.  I felt quite ill, to be honest.

Anyway, I’m somewhat annoyed that I had to go through two packs of ramen that I myself bought and that there has been no free food whatsoever at the office over the past two days, but at least SS bought me dinner last night and A gave me several meals’ worth of jelly beans.

Sunday 4/19

19 Apr

Well, perhaps eating only dried berries and chips all day yesterday wasn’t the smartest idea.  It essentially caused me to blackout after only three beers and throw up bile this morning.  Poor performance; this is a new form of pathetic.  But I do it in the name of poverexia.

After unnaturally waking up at 9:00am to ralph, all I wanted was Tasty King lunch special, best deal in NYC (meal + any type of rice (including fried rice!!!!) + any type of soup for $5.50 or under).  I cursed the world because I knew Tasty King wasn’t going to be open that early on a Sunday morning, so I forced myself to go back to sleep until noon, at which point I ran outside to go get the beef and broccoli with pork fried rice (it’s not even any extra charge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and wonton soup for $5.50 that I had been waiting for all week.  Tasty King lunch special is without a doubt the best deal in NYC and they give you SO much beef and broccoli and so much rice and so much soup and if you don’t want soup you can exchange for a soda!!!!!!!!!!  It is so incred.

I ate half for lunch, and then slept and tanned on my bed (I get a lot of direct sunlight coming through my window, and windows help prevent skin cancer), then woke up 5 hours later, then ate the rest for dinner.  Typical Sunday.

Saturday 4/18

18 Apr

All I’ve eaten all day today are the following:

  • Goji berries (from S)
  • Mulberries (from S)
  • 1 clementine (from S)
  • 2 slices of tomato (from S)
  • Some chips (from S)
  • A bite of froyo (from B)
  • Some random slices of apple (from Union Square market)
  • Some bits of cracker with jam (from Union Square market)